I had a somewhat stressful day at work today, so to unwind I decided to walk home from work.   I live about 5 miles from work so I had an hour and a half to think about a lot of things.  My goal is to try to put these thoughts from my walk into this blog.  This is going to be a less humorous and more serious blog, we’ll see how much I like doing these =P

Things I have learned in my 26 years on Planet Earth.

Be Optimistic – There is always some good to be found in every situation.  A major key to finding your own happiness is seeing this.  It was 41 degrees and raining a cold light early spring rain on my walk home today, but that didn’t bother me, because I made this decision so I could get some time to think.   Some people say it is God’s way to test you, or as Garth Brooks would say “Some of Gods greatest gifts are unanswered prayers.”  Even if things look bad or are not going right in your life, YOU have the power to change that, even if it is just by changing your perception.  Looking back on my childhood I had a lot of family trips, I remember the good times, but you also always remember when things didn’t go as planned.  They may seem like a disaster at the time, but you live though them and can look back happily on them.  Now take that one step further and see them that way as they are happening to you.  This is key to being truly happy with your life.

Take Some “Me” Time – One part about finding your optimism is to get some “me” time in.  Everyone needs some time alone to think things through, without this you don’t have a way to cope with the things in your life.   For me it is sudoku, but I also find more ways to get thinking time in.  You can put on a nice movie and watch it alone, listen to your favorite music, etc.  On my walk home today, despite the rain and cold I stopped at a park on the way home and sat on the swings for a bit.  I was enjoying my alone time and I wanted to get some more of it, it was refreshing and nostalgic to swing for a few minutes and just reflect on things going on in my life.  Reflection is important for your happiness as well, never be afraid to evaluate your decisions or current place in life.  You ultimately are the one that has to live your life, and if you don’t like what you are doing or where you are, you have the power to change that.

Be Open-Minded – One thing that always helps me keep my mind sharp is having intellectual discussions that may change my beliefs or help me see things in a different way.  This quote from Henry Ford sums it up nicely “If there is any one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person’s point of view and see things from that person’s angle as well as from your own.” This is the best advice I have heard when it comes to arguments or disagreements.  Every argument can be quickly dissolved when you can put yourself in the others shoes.  Being open-minded also allows you to always learn new things.  I am always on a personal quest to learn everything I can, the more you understand things the easier it is to find the right solution to every problem.

Be Patient – On my walk home, as I said I stopped and swung briefly, don’t be in a hurry to get somewhere or do something.  You only get to live this life once, so don’t be in a hurry, or you can’t really enjoy it.   The cliche’s “take time to smell the roses” and “good things come to those who wait” have some real meanings when you take the time to think about them.   You won’t be happy with the world around you if you don’t see the beauty in everything around you, and you can’t do that when you are in a hurry.  This is a common technique used in reverse in most sports; When I was in Wrestling in High School and Fencing in College, something you always learn is don’t be in a hurry to make the first move.  When things are rushed they become sloppy and unnatural, by taking your time you can do things right and in a more instinctual way.

Be Passionate About Something – I struggled with this on my walk home.  Most people are passionate about a hobby or activity in their lives.  My Parents raised me to believe that nothing is outside of my ability or comprehension, so I have tried many different things and can enjoy them, but I have lacked that passion for hobbies, one that I really do want to get involved in is playing the guitar and the Piano, if anyone has either and wants to help me out =).  I realized I don’t have any one hobby I am passionate about, but I found that my passion is People.  One driving force in my life has been helping other people.  Whether it is the listening ear when someone needs to talk or the person with the smile on their face that helps get you in a better mood, I always want to try to help people out.  This leads me to my next point

Be Liberal With Your Time And Money – You can’t take either of them with you when you leave here.  One thing I learned from my dad is always be available to help a friend in need.  When I needed help pushing the car up my driveway, I knew I could call Shaun and he would come over just to help.  But he should know that if he ever needed me for anything, I would be over right away, even at 3am.  I am that way with everyone, if anyone I know needed help with anything they can call on me, and I will do whatever is in my power to help them.  It is different than doing something for someone and expecting their help in return, it is giving without any expectations of them.  Often at work we take turns buying lunch, and I honestly forget who owes me money or a sandwich next time.  It doesn’t really matter to me, I would hope that if I really couldn’t afford to buy lunch that they would just cover the cost and not hold a debt over me.  This ties into my belief that everyone is inherently good and wants others around them to be happy.

Be In Touch With Your Emotions – This one I put in here as something that I see that I need to do more of, but it is very important to being happy with yourself.  I have an easy time of bottling up my emotions and not really dealing with them, then when I do let them all out it is like a torrent.  This leads to unnecessary stress in my life.  Something that I want to do more of is letting people know when they do something that doesn’t make me happy.  Being honest with myself is the first step though, because I will rationalize it to myself for a long time until I can’t handle it anymore.

I didn’t mean for this to get this long, nor am I trying to be a motivational writer.  I just wanted to share what I have learned about my personal road to happiness.  Please leave me a comment, let me know your thoughts, if you have anything to add or disagree with me.  Til next time <3 Doug.